


To Make an Omelette (Sometimes One Must Break a Few Eggs)

by AceQueenKing



Category: Star Wars Legends: The Old Republic (Video Game)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Blood and Gore, Decapitation, F/F, Murder, Sith Shenanigans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-12
Updated: 2019-01-12
Packaged: 2019-10-08 18:38:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17391569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AceQueenKing/pseuds/AceQueenKing
Summary: "Look at the floor. It's like an abattoir. We're never going to get the deposit back on this hovel."





	To Make an Omelette (Sometimes One Must Break a Few Eggs)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kimaracretak](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kimaracretak/gifts).



"It's no good, darling," Zash said, staring forlornly at the blood-soaked bedsheet. "You've messed it up, _again_."

"What?" Her damnable former apprentice's eyes flickered with an expression Zash suspected was amusement, though the bright yellow-eyed whelp was doing her best to feint ignorance of human anatomy. She shrugged, her lekku flopping over her shoulders. "She's still in one piece. Mostly."

"And bled almost entirely. Look at the floor. It's like an abattoir. We're never going to get the deposit back on this hovel." Darth Nox looked at her and huffed; as if they worried about such things as mere money, now.

"Do humans need blood?" Darth Nox looked at one of her lekku like it was the most interesting thing in the room. "I thought it was optional for your lot. Like hair."

"Decidedly not." She opened one of the Dashade's big clumsy hands and debated yanking Nox's lekku with it. Nox's expression - demure, slightly affected innocense - demanded she wait. Zash pouted. "I liked this one, too. She was so...pleasingly proportioned."

"We can find you another one with big tits." Nox raised an eyebrow. "It isn't as if the universe is running out of your kind, you know. Though you do have such funny parts. Like the hair - what is this even for?" Nox yanked at the blond's long, gorgeous hair, and Zash tried not to wince as the head popped off in Nox's long fingers. Nox threw it to the ground in boredom; Zash sighed. What a waste.

"I suppose we shall have to try again," Nox said, and Zash did not reply, simply grinding the Dashade's teeth to smaller nubs. The worst part of this whole ridiculous scheme was that she was wholly forced to rely upon Darth Nox, who she suspected had not entirely forgive her for the whole 'tried to kill you for your sexy body' thing. They were Sith! It was what they did, and yet clearly the twilek still held a grudge.

"Don't worry," Nox said with a grin. "I'm getting better at figuring out what parts are optional and which are necessary all the time!"

The Force itself help Zash, she would throttle Nox with her bare arms if she had to live another year as this stinking hulk of a creature.

"I suppose we should leave the planet before the downstairs neighbor complains about an odd stain on their ceiling." As the only living Dashade, it wasn't as if Zash could exactly blend in. As two aliens renting a flat in a human quarter at a frankly exorbitant rate, it was only the Sith Lord robes on Nox's body - and the excellent lightsaber Zash had thoughtlessly gifted her long ago - that kept them from being arrested at any point.

"I suppose so." Nox slapped Zash on the Dashade's flat, broad ass and grinned as she began her ungodly slow and, no doubt, sultry, walk back to their ship. "Don't worry, Zash - I hear Tatooine's a great place to find bodies without questions, and it's summer there!"

She glared balefully at Nox as Nox wiggled down the corridor, laughing softly to herself as they went. 


End file.
